Why You Are Resistant to Networking
“Networking” often elicits feelings of resistance and discomfort, even among seasoned professionals. Despite its reputation as a crucial career strategy, many find the practice daunting. If this resonates with you, let’s explore the reasons behind networking resistance and how to overcome it.
1. Waiting Until It's Necessary
One of the biggest challenges with networking is that many people only engage when they need something—like a job or an introduction. This approach makes networking feel transactional and urgent, which can be uncomfortable. Instead, think of networking as ongoing professional development. Building and maintaining relationships over time makes it easier to ask for help when needed.
2. Misaligned Expectations
Many people resist networking because they feel awkward asking for a job. However, effective networking isn’t about making big asks upfront. Instead of requesting a job, consider asking for a conversation about someone’s experiences, insights into a company, or advice on navigating an industry. These smaller, easier requests are more likely to build meaningful connections over time.
3. Underestimating the Power of Relationships
Networking is often misunderstood as a one-time interaction. A single coffee chat or email exchange doesn’t constitute a relationship. Real networking involves multiple touchpoints—following up, staying in touch, and offering value in return. Remember, the goal isn’t just to get a job but to cultivate a network of mutually beneficial professional relationships.
4. Discomfort in Talking About Yourself
Many people avoid networking because they dislike talking about themselves, fearing it feels pushy or self-promotional. One way to address this discomfort is by practicing how you present your skills and accomplishments. Start by refining your resume or LinkedIn profile; this foundation will make discussing your strengths in conversations feel more natural and confident.
5. Uncertainty About What to Say
Another common barrier is not knowing what to ask or how to start a conversation. Reflect on what you genuinely want to learn—whether it’s about an industry, a role, or career transitions. Frame your curiosity into respectful, concise questions that are easy for others to answer. Being prepared with a few thoughtful questions can make your networking efforts more effective and less intimidating.
Overcoming Resistance
Building and nurturing a professional network takes time, but the effort pays off in the long run. Here are a few steps to get started:
Commit to regular networking, even when you’re not job searching.
Focus on building genuine connections rather than immediate outcomes.
Reframe your approach to see networking as an exchange of value and insights.
Develop clear, realistic asks that are easy for others to fulfill.
Follow up consistently and stay engaged with your network over time.
By viewing networking as an essential part of career maintenance rather than a last-minute task, you can reduce the resistance and create a supportive professional ecosystem. Prioritize relationships, and the opportunities will follow.